Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Perceptions

I am thinking today about perceptions. What I see, hear, smell, taste, touch may be completely different from what you perceive. Perceptions may change as well what may have been one day may be different the next based on a lot of factors.

Perceptions shape our thoughts and our actions, for instance, say you meet someone for the first time and think to yourself, "they are arrogant, they are shy, they are nice, they are not nice."

These are perceptions formed from a brief interaction, in many ways we need these judgements for some sort of guidance about who to develop a friendship with, who to trust and who to avoid.

Yet many times these perceptions are wrong, thus knowing this I try to keep an open mind about people until they prove quite succinctly that they are someone to avoid.

I have also found that perceptions shape the thought processes of others with whom we meet and interact, that is, what you say can effect upon other peoples ideas about themselves and life in general.

Sometimes we characterize our children into certain categories, "oh he's the smart one, she's lazy, she is just cranky all of the time." Admittedly I am guilty of this, for kids all have very different personalities.

I tend to think that these labels can be limiting, who wants to be known as the lazy one? The cranky one? I try to avoid saying anything negative about the kids in front of them, plus I try to avoid excessively praising one over the other when the other kids are in the room (It creates jealousies.)

Labels become self perpetrating prophecies, when your children hear the things that you say about them, they will act out what they think your perception of them is.

It can effect you as well, your own self talk can limit or help you.

I think, that in order to avoid ridiculing ourselves, we need to take a look at things in perspective. Look over your whole life, the opportunities that you have had, the situation that you have grown up in, mistakes that you have made. All of these things are in the past, you must accept that they have happened and move on.

Then, think about what brings you joy, what you enjoy doing. Focus on those things, and ignore voices of self doubt. Look at yourself in the mirror and smile, look into your own eyes and find acceptance. Move forward, don't dwell, move forward.

Saying all of this, I know that depression is very real. I used to be depressed all of the time. The change in my diet helped me to overcome it, though I still go through certain periods of depression.

What I find helps me is acknowledging that depression as a thing separate from myself, and pressing forward with my goals and plans despite it all. I fight it, I look for foods that I can eat to help change the chemical balance in my body (Omega-3 oils, Maca, Roobios tea are some). I exercise even if I don't particularly feel like it, and even if I think that I look like the biggest dork out on the street I keep walking anyway.

Depression brings with it different perceptions, and with those I try to make the best of the emotion by writing something. Some of the most interesting things I have written have come from the depressions that I have gone through.

Then, when I am on the other side, I am more able to feel the gladness of life and the beauty of things.

Don't ever think, if you are depressed, that it is a reflection of your true self. You are a creature of light and life, an interesting person. Not the outward shell, not the inward sadness but someone who is of eternal worth.

I am very happy today to have heard from a returning missionary in our ward, and to then go and hear from my little brother who is set to leave on his mission on the 7th of August.

He is very special to me, he was the first little creature that I mothered as a young girl. I remember reading to him the book "The Giving Tree," over and over again. Plus I remember him asking me "how do we hear, what makes sound?"

I explained to his rapt listening ears that there are invisible sound waves that travel through the air to reach our ear drum. I then had him recall seeing the vibration of things like drums and strings.

He has struggled with ADD or earlier on ADHD and being medicated with Ritalin. My parents did not know what else to do, I don't blame them it is a hard thing to deal with.

In fact my own little boy has some form of ADD, not diagnosed but I know the signs. I brought him out of school last year to home school him and have been partially successful as he now knows how to read and he's not dumb on his math facts either.

Yet he still struggles with writing things, and he does struggle a bit with the flow of reading (plus some other facts). I wish I could have done better for him, I went through a terrible year last year and the beginning of this, so I didn't teach him as much as I could have.

But at least he wants to learn and that is an important factor in life, something that being in school was zapping away from him. I have to send him to second grade though, because I need to work, I fear for the little fellow.

Anyhow, this post is long enough. I hope you all have a good and blessed day.

SG

1 comment:

GingerV said...

my grandson feels he can't write and has never graduated from high school because of this one belief. now too late I had a friend tell me to call him on the phone and get him to talk, if you can talk you can write, get him to talk, tell you stories about things he likes, then see if he can write them down (later after he is good at talking.)