Old Memories

2/26/2011

Roxie is building a tower of useless nick knacks, it is my "Birthday" present, it keeps falling apart because it involves random broken objects a folded valentine and a bouncy ball. The kids entertained themselves by creating a FB Profile for our cat Allycia, Koli spelled it that way when he created it. Apparently the cat has more education than I do, she attended the best high school and university in the US! 

My dad is contemplating standing on the corner with a hobo sign since he hasn't had much work lately, he makes it a point to tell us he's almost out of money and then goes to the store and buys industrial sized jugs of pasta sauce, cereal and oranges. 

Mom is highly amused at the things that you do on FB, her and Kelsey were giggling about your status of "Papaya" when I walked in today. 

I've been studying for the GMAT all day, the only problem was that I was studying at mom's house which was highly distracting, I think it did some good though...

Well now it's time to do scriptures and prayer for the night.

Trying to capture beauty...

Tomorrow I'm scheduled for surgery, it's a minor surgery for pelvic congestion syndrome. This has got me in a reflective mood. I want to write something beautiful, there's so much beauty in nature. When I look out of my sliding glass windows up into the mountains the green hills, the verdant leafs on the aspens and pines, I feel a certain sense of awe. The blue sky, the purple flowers of the lilac trees, the white and pink flowering trees. 

It's a hopeful feeling, it's a nostalgic feeling I want to capture the beauty within my heart. The majesty of the mountains dusky in the morning, the bright sun illuminating the clouds that hug the mountains in the sky.

But then how can I really capture beauty in the written form? It's limited, my perception is limited and the vibrancy of the colors are all after images in my eyes, after images stored in my minds eye. 

The particular feelings that I feel, I want to share with someone and somehow be closer to others through that shared sense of beauty.

and when someday my perceptions have failed I wish that the observations of my heart will live on...

Some Advice

The advice I would give to my children at this point in my life is minimal. There are many things that they are going to find out on their own a lot of things come down to common sense. Perhaps I would warn them against any scheme that sounds to good to be true, no matter how enthusiastic the person trying to sell you on the idea is, it is worth being highly skeptical and keeping your money rather than giving away your money if you don't see the value of something clearly up front.

One piece of advice I wish I would have been told is to forgive yourself for the mistakes that you've made. You're not going to see the result of the decisions you've made for many years sometimes. If you think you've made a grave error do your best to remedy it and work towards your goals with determination. Don't let other peoples voices of doubt about you stop you from moving forward with making positive changes in your life.

Support others and envy them less. You don't know their story, you'll never guess the tricks that life will play on them or you. You might find  yourself feeling sorry for them at some point, resist this as well. Do your best to treat everyone you meet with respect and equanimity.

Treat the money that you earn with respect. Every hour of your time spent working should be respected. Don't waste your money on frivolous things, don't even waste it on what seems like important things at the time. Get the necessities of life, do spend money on trips and on helping to ease the burden of others, but don't worry about how you look in others eyes (materialistically speaking).

Respect the work that you do, even if it's not the work you would ideally be doing. Respect your situation in life and make the best of what you have. Not everyone will make a lot of money in their life and that's OK. Do what you can to be happy and live a good life with what you have.

SG