It's been about a year since I wrote something here. A lot has happened. I started school, I got engaged, I moved our family in with my Fiance, I got married, I went to Ireland with my mom, sister and daughter. I've been sick off and on and it's affected my performance at work and at school.
My performance at work is the most troubling. During my weekly 1:1 meeting my manager told me that he's bringing in HR. It's what I feared, what I've been worrying about... the question is, did my own worries about this happening somehow manifest? Like the book "The Secret" suggests would happen. Or did I just read the situation correctly? I think it's the later rather than the former.
Geez I've forgotten how difficult it is to put my thoughts into words.
I think a lot. Things naturally flow from one thought to another and bounce around in my head, circling around and it's hard to make them stop. Especially when they are creating more anxiety.
With these 1:1 sessions my manager brings up errors, to me they are a reflection of how healthy I've been. When I feel well the error rate is low, when I feel like crap the errors are higher. At the moment I feel good, thus the errors are lower.
How do I explain this to HR? My manager? They don't care what has caused the problem... er I don't know maybe HR does. I hope.
I explain the reasons for my problems to my sweetheart and he dives into explanations about avoiding saying certain things to HR, sounding negative...
The thing is, I dislike the anxiety, A LOT. I hate not knowing what to expect out of this situation.
I guess I just need to improve, keep my error rate low... sleep more so that I will be better at my job.
SG
My performance at work is the most troubling. During my weekly 1:1 meeting my manager told me that he's bringing in HR. It's what I feared, what I've been worrying about... the question is, did my own worries about this happening somehow manifest? Like the book "The Secret" suggests would happen. Or did I just read the situation correctly? I think it's the later rather than the former.
Geez I've forgotten how difficult it is to put my thoughts into words.
I think a lot. Things naturally flow from one thought to another and bounce around in my head, circling around and it's hard to make them stop. Especially when they are creating more anxiety.
With these 1:1 sessions my manager brings up errors, to me they are a reflection of how healthy I've been. When I feel well the error rate is low, when I feel like crap the errors are higher. At the moment I feel good, thus the errors are lower.
How do I explain this to HR? My manager? They don't care what has caused the problem... er I don't know maybe HR does. I hope.
I explain the reasons for my problems to my sweetheart and he dives into explanations about avoiding saying certain things to HR, sounding negative...
The thing is, I dislike the anxiety, A LOT. I hate not knowing what to expect out of this situation.
I guess I just need to improve, keep my error rate low... sleep more so that I will be better at my job.
SG
No comments:
Post a Comment