Taking responsibility

Why is this country, nay the world, in an economic crises? Why is it that we have so much abundance, yet so much sickness, poverty and suffering?

In general the religious answer is that people need to repent. If you are not generally religious it still makes sense that when people in general act in a dog, eat dog way and make poor choices, in fact the entire country gets to a point where people have no sense of personal responsibility along with a covetous and greedy attitude, it means trouble.

I was thinking about this today as I had two differing experiences. First of all I was in a wholeistic doctors office where the receptionist made a general comment about how enjoyable it was to work there because their clients were happy people. She said, “(you know), those people who take responsibility for their health take responsibility for their lives in other ways…” I tend to agree with that statement, it makes sense to me.

Then ironically, since I am frustrated by this next bit, I went to apply for government assistance with our utility bills.

Sitting in the government agency building where people come to apply for the food bank and utility assistance, the most prevalent sensation is that of grime. I used to bring hand sanitizer with me, when I would go to government offices because they somehow always end up seeming grimy to me. Then there is the prevalent smell of cigarette smoke, and generally the people sitting in government offices applying for assistance are people who have problems, self control problems, mental problems, weight problems, job problems, in the case of the immigrant families problems speaking English and discrimination. So I was thinking about something while looking around at the smokers, the druggies, the large and the small, the immigrants. Each of us had gotten there through the use of decisions and consequences in our lives, and I certainly didn’t feel any inclination to feel like I was above the others because I too was sitting in a government office applying for assistance with my utilities. I too had made decisions that brought me to that point. I too had to live with the consequences.

Am I different? Yes my choices have been different, but I have also failed in big way’s and in small. This world is hard to navigate, it is hard to fully see the consequence of our behavior. I think that it is fair to say that even if there is not a God, though I believe in God, that the things that have traditionally been considered “sins” per say are the very things that lead to the negative consequences that we are dealing with.

Greed, avarice, indulgence, sexual promiscuousness, alcohol, smoking, laziness, idleness (same thing), all of the traditional vices are the logical objects of blame for the situation that we are in. For if people are not willing to take personal responsibility, then there is no way to regulate the effects on other people and for that matter the world.

What gets to me about the attitude of my siblings (older brother excepting) is that they think that nullism is funny, and this is the attitude that is fed our children regularly and generally through the television. I can see the appeal of it, entertainment wise, but it is sending the wrong message. Really what is funny about idiocy, of self indulgence and permissiveness? Not much when it leads to a nation of overweight, self indulgent, people who cannot be trusted to accept responsibility for the decisions that they make. It is not funny, in essence we are making ourselves slaves of convenience, and I argue almost anything that is made for “convenience” sake, i.e. plastic bags, paper plates, fast food, t.v. dinners, self stable milk… it is all going to lead to the un-thoughtful consequence of ruining lives.
It makes me think about the thoughtful peoples of the earth, those people who used to be in charge, who respected themselves and the earth. Like the American Indians, indigenous peoples. They cared, they used everything that they were given, the whole buffalo as it were and they did not disrespect the earth and animals in general. Maybe that is one of the currents that runs through our people and country because now that I think of it there have always been lawless people who would go around killing buffalo, wolves etc. just for the heck of it. I guess that the streak has had its way with us, and now we have the difficult consequences to deal with, everyone does.

What can we do? I guess the only thing is to take a look at what we consider to be funny, what we allow ourselves to do, and gauge how much respect that we have towards ourselves, the earth and others. Then taking action to change and rid ourselves of the vices that have brought us to this point. Responsibility, that’s the answer.

Who is in control?

It is interesting to me as I learn more about real food (why do I even need to do this?) That there are a lot of people out there who theorize that we are being controled. By the Fed, Big Pharma (pharmacutical companies), the Government. If their case is true then who is in control? Who is planning the poor quality of our food (and addictive nature), which in turn leads us to poor health (and the ubiquitous drug commercials), which in turn leads us to apathy, which leads us to ignorance.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that there is not a connection, there definantly is. I grew up in a home filled with American style reasoning, cooking and methods. My mom worked, we ate junk food at all times (I am not refering soley to potato chips and candy which were ubiquitous enough, I am refering to the negligible nutritional quality of cereals, boxed dinners and canned vegetables). The television was on all of the time, and we never sat down and had conversations about the world, politics or things of importance. So I grew up with the idea (and I find this attitude to be everywhere) that there is nothing wrong with our food. If you eat too much you get fat, vegetables are generally good for you but you don't need them if you take a vitamin. Plus if you want to lose weight eating all veggies will do it (and that a vegetarian diet with little to no fat is good for you). I also had the idea that if you got sick it was because germs and viruses had invaded your body and that science just hadn't found the answer yet (ie drug) to end our bouts of illness. (Most people that read this if raised in America will not find the irony in these statements).

It and is such an inorganic, clinical view. Since this view is so pervasive it is easy to write off people with a different opinion as radical.

I have heard it said that all of the great dictatorships and regimes were able to maintain control as long as the people were kept in ignorance. Well I can tell you this, I have recieved a Bachelors Degree in Accounting, yet I still feel very uneducated. I can tell you from experience that I felt more like the teachers wanted me to regurgitate the book or information that they gave me and were not interested in real learning, too bad, life would have been a lot more interesting if my classes had been more like a hands on learning experience then an endless recicitation of abstract facts.

I feel cheated somehow, yet I know that real learning comes from the learners willingness to explore their subject. In fact I learned more in Accounting 1010 then any of the other classes on the subject because I got a copy of an old accounting textbook and read it through.

So now that I am off of my rant on how uneducated I feel, which I am attempting to remedy by reading a lot more, I will get back to my original rant about who is in charge. Like I said historically "the masses" have been and are controled through ignorance. Yet it was relatively easy to point out who was in charge, now it is not quite as easy. Is there some kind of corporate conspiracy, where they get together and decide to introduce addictive substances into our foods, or drugs that control our minds, or who decide who should be the next president? How scary is that idea?

I am inclined to think though that the USA is a product of a general mindset that we have had throughout our history of "New" and more "Innovative" ways of thinking and that we lost the conventional wisdom of our ancestors in the process.

Conspiracy theories are unnerving, they might be right, they might be wrong. I find them not to be very productive.

I would rather work towards a better life, for me and my family by trying to avoid as much as possible the cycle of poor eating, ill health, doctors visits and government dependance.

That's all for now.

~Strawberry Girl

Peeling away layers of confussion...

One of my greatest strengths is determination, and I have needed it.

My life has been like a puzzle, at a very young age I realized that something was wrong, but I couldn't explain it.

Frustration, that is the predominate feeling throughout even my earliest awareness.

I remember climbing out of my crib, how the world swirled around me, how hard I concentrated to find a way down. I remember crying because I thought everyone was talking about me, and I couldn't understand. I remember the stomach aches, lying on the couch in the living room while everyone was eating dinner I cried because it hurt so badly and my parents ignored me because they thought I was being stubborn, that I didn't want to eat my dinner.

My brother was diagnosed with Autism at about 3 or 4, at about the same time I had several seizures. They couldn't explain it, they put me on dilantin, the same drug that my brother took. They hooked me up to a brain wave monitor and tried to figure out what was wrong but couldn't.

The seizures stopped by themselves and so everyone assumed that I was fine. I guess the deceptive thing was that I interacted with people and didn't freak out like my brother did.

But I had a hard time making friends, I would have given a lot to know the secret to it. What made it difficult for me was the fact that I couldn't understand peoples motivations, and I lived in a world of dark fog that swirled around me making me feel as though the world was closing in. In medical terms it is called free floating anxiety.

I couldn't run, I remember so clearly trying to run with the other kids. My lungs would seize up, my head would hurt, I would have to walk. It was so embarrassing to me because I would lag behind everyone else, perhaps they thought I was lazy.

It was hard to stay a full day at school sometimes, for several reasons, I was severely depressed and really only a young kid. I kept wishing that I could talk to a councilor, my mom didn't understand why, I thought that it would help though.

Another reason why it was hard to stay at school was the stomach aches, the bloating, the gas... oh how terrible it was to try and sit at a desk, the edge of which was only a few inches from my hurting tummy. I would walk home burping gas that was like a rotten egg. I remember sitting in the bathroom at home, holding onto the door and just feeling so, so ill. The thought was, what is wrong with me?

The trouble was that no one could explain what was wrong with me. I had gone to doctors, they always had something to prescribe, but nothing alleviated the symptoms. In fact every single remedy that doctors have ever given me has aggravated my condition and/or completely missed the mark altogether.

Case in point, Prozac, I took it one time and went into a swirling darkness where all that I could think is that I wanted to kill myself. I lay down in my closet and hugged my knees until it wore off, then I threw it away.

Determination has kept me going though, I have never been comfortable with the idea that I could just ignore what was wrong with me and allow my life to be dictated by the monster of ignorance.

The triggers that led me to realize that there were answers to my disorder were a combination of several things. One of which was the walnuts that I decided to add to my cereal (because I heard that they had Omega-3 oils and I thought that the only way to get those in my diet was through eating fish). At the time I had gotten very skinny on Weight Watchers, so I carefully calculated 3 points worth of Walnuts to add to my morning bowl of Special K and started to eat that every morning. Amazingly, one day I woke up and I was happy, calm and happy and all that I could attribute it to was the walnuts.

So I told everyone to eat walnuts to be happy, they thought I was insane.

Then I decided to try making more things from scratch, after all it was expensive to buy boxed stuff all of the time. I started with bran muffins, and I thought that I would have so much energy that I could help my dad plant his garden and that things would be spiffy!

So I started to make and eat a lot of bran muffins... plus I decided to become a vegan and thought I could replace meat with TVP. I became extremely ill, I tried to take walks with my daughter, but would get about a half mile out and could barely lift my feet so I would turn around.

Plus the pain, oh my goodness it was terrible, I was so so bloated, oh it hurts to think of it. I went to the doctor, she couldn't figure out what I should do, she gave me enemas, told me to drink prune juice, that didn't help me at all.

Eventually I became so ill that I felt I was dying, it was like an honest to goodness out of body experience. I could barley lift my daughter I could barely walk, I remember slowly making my way up the walk to my parents house, setting my daughter down and sitting at the kitchen table, observing the world pass by.

My mom came into the kitchen and I told her that I felt like I was slowly dying, I felt that it was alright, I supposed that no one could control when their time came and so I resigned myself to writing a few words of advice to my little sister and resting until I passed away.

I took my baby daughter home, lay down on the bed and closed my eyes, laboring to breathe trying to absorb her presence. Irrationally I didn't want to go to the hospital because we didn't have insurance and it would cost too much. As a last resort I called up the pediatrician who had been my doctor from  birth and who was my children's doctor at that time. He heard me out and decided that I probably had a condition called "Alkalosis" caused by the change in protein (to TVP) and he suggested that I breath into a paper sack slowly... maybe he thought I was hyperventilating... 

This is when my friend, who has studied natural healing, suggested that I cut gluten out of my diet. I did and a week later things were starting to resolve themselves. The depression was lifting, the brain fog was dissipating, at one moment it was if everything became clear all at once and I sat by the mirror reflecting upon my life and crying, crying because I had been affected in so many ways by ignorance.

This was only the beginning of my journey to being well, I have bought and tried and read so much information on health and what could be good for the body that I sometimes feel a bit estranged from everyone else.

It takes a lot of intuition to figure out what is really wrong, why you don't feel good. I don't believe in any one food, or any one thing... all I know is that each person that truly wants to feel healthy has to define that for themselves and take small leaps of faith until they figure out what works for them.

Plus it is expensive to figure it out as well, I've had to have blood testing (self ordered... it cost about $500 dollars), plus I've had an independent lab help me determine whether or not I was truly gluten intolerant. Then there is the cost of experimentation with all of the different foods and herbal supplements that are out there... and as you all know, there are a lot of them.

Generally, what I think will work most of the time for people is focusing on a few key factors.

Vitamin D levels
Vitamin B-12 levels
Omega Oils (Chia seeds are a nice source, but an incomplete solution)
Blueberries
Avoiding Gluten (It is estimated that 1 in 100 people are sensitive to gluten)
Adding the supplement GABA
Taurine
L-Tryptophan (getting enough Omega Oils, Taurine and L-Tryptophan are all going to help to getting a good nights rest).
Probiotics - especially probiotic drinks (help even out your digestive system)

I like buckwheat (which is a gluten free seed that is unrelated to wheat)

Some foods that don't agree with me and supplements that I don't like (an incomplete list)

Flax seed (makes me incredibly angry and irrational)
Sesame seed (makes me high)
St. Johns Wort (gave me a reaction similar to prozac... I wanted to kill myself)

Plus many, many different herbs that are good for some people but not good for me... like I said, intuition should play a big role in sorting out what works for you... plus don't think that you've settled on something because often times you can be taking something that seems to have no effect, or it seems to aggravate things and you've got to reevaluate everything basically until you figure it all out.

Good luck with your journey...

SG

Check out that glow!!

I went over to my friends house yesterday to see if she happened to have a SCOBY (a simbiotic "mushroom" like culture) laying around for making Kombucha Tea. We are culturing our Kombucha from Roobios tea to avoid the caffiene from Green Tea (black, white etc.). Roobios is said to be even higher in antioxidants than green. So we've been culturing our tea, or I should say, she has been culturing the tea because I keep killing my Scoby. Whether it is because the tea is too hot when I add the mushroom, or in this case I had a weak mushroom (from adding it to too hot tea) and I added it to tea I had thoroughly cooled but the sugar hadn't disolved very well and the mushroom got attacked by an outside mold or something, it didn't look to good. She has a bit more time to research these things since she only has one kid and no husband. So that's my excuse ;p But I think this time I am going to do some more research. She had the most radient, gorgeous glow!! I know it's from eatting a few more raw foods than I do (I have been slacking). I think I will go out and buy a bunch of raw foods. But besides for that I want to take the raw foods classes that she took. Though I have to watch it because they use things like flax seed, beet powder and sesame seeds (if you read my previous post you'll know why I have to avoid these, especially sesame seeds ;p). Maybe I will get a raw foods book and work on my non-cooking, cooking skills.

Besides for that, it is tax season, yikes!! Now last years mess from not having financial software all year is coming out to bite. (Besides for running over costs and losing a bunch of money). Hubby finally got me the software I had been asking for all year in November and I put a lot of our info. on it, but I still have a lot to sort through. GROWL!! So I am going to be busy with that, for a bit, luckily he came and got the kids today so that I can get things sorted.

I hope everyone has a good day. :0)

The Effect of Food on Your Body

This is a topic that I have been meaning to get to and I feel that it is importaint enough to post here as well as in my health blog. Over the past two years, I have gone through a metamorphosis of sorts. Begining at being super skinny from being on Weight Watchers, to now where I am at a healthy weight (though I will be happy to get out an exercise again). I am not super, super skinny and I feel a lot better for it. I do think though that eventually I will be able to get back into my "skinnier" jeans if I feel like it (I am a size 4-6 right now, size 4 is my skinniest). At my thinnest on Weight Watchers I felt devoid of all feeling, like a shell. I wasn't happy with my body, it left me with little satisfaction since I still thought I needed to lose even more weight. Let me tell you what I think happened. Weight Watchers claims to be a lifestyle change instead of a diet, I guess if you know a lot about food and are committed to a completely whole foods diet it can work for you. I decided to do the "points" program and therefore only bought things that were packaged because I could then determine the points values more easily. This worked, I lost weight. The drawback was as I said not feeling anything, slowed thought process, a loss of energy, feelings of inferiority, anxiety. I had a hard time making up my mind on what clothes to wear, and I always felt uncomfortable in what I did choose to wear. Doesn't sound like much fun does it? Well here are a few things that I learned from my experience. Your body needs fat, and not just any type of fat. Your brain really needs fat. Here are a few that I have learned to stay away from. Canolla oil, vegetable oils, refined olive oils, refined oils of any kind. Some people can handle these next one's but they really affect me flaxseed oil, safflower oil, evening primrose oil, borage oil. In fact over the past two day's I have had a terrible headache and I have been really touchy and angry because I ate some Gluten Free Crackers that have safflower oil in them. I am finally feeling my natural calm again because I figured out what was doing it. Here is a list of the fats and oils that work really well with me. Unrefined natural organic oils, coconut oil, olive oil, avocado oil, walnut, sunflower seed (to a lesser degree). Unrefined Palm oil is said to be healthy by many people now. I have a bottle and it is a beautiful rich orange color indicating a high degree of caratanoids, but my body doesn't like it much. Then there are animal fats, fish oil works really well for me, (especially if I eat wild caught Salmon). Organic lard (really hard to find I had to order some online from Amish farmers). Grass fed beef contains a lot of beneficial fat, you don't necessarily need to eat a lot of the fat, but you don't need to fuss about taking all of it off either. Plus beautiful yellow butter from grass fed cows, Yumy! You need to soak seeds, nuts and grains, at least over night. This might not be immediately obvious to you, but try it a few times (even if your almonds look like swollen ballons in the morning). The water that you soaked your nuts will be a dark brown or reddish color. This is the enzyme inhibitors that keep the seeds/nuts from sprouting until soaked and they block your body from absorbing the nutrients from the seeds/nuts. Grains also contain enzyme inhibitors, try soaking your oatmeal overnight and then cook it in the morning. You will feel a difference in the amount of energy that you feel after eatting, than if you didn't take this step. I am not positive, but I think that you need to be careful with how long you soak your nuts. I have gotten a strange taste after eatting almonds that have soaked for a few day's. Really intense almond flavor, but with a really strange bite to it. I recommend throwing away your microwave. Before you think I have lost it, let me tell you the result that I got after doing it. Number 1, I learned to cook really well. Number 2, the food that I cook tastes really good. Number 3, I feel a lot more energy from lightly steamed veggies than from "nuked" veggies. Number 4, soup and stuff doesn't take that long to heat up on the stove anyway. Number 5, I put a toster oven where the microwave used to be and use it all of the time. The biggest reason I did it was because I researched the issue and found that even if the research was incomplete the possible risks of continuing to use my microwave were to great. Here are a few observations on how foods that my body doesn't like affect my body. Beets- make my heart rate increase, as well as my breathing. So do tomatoes but not as bad. Cabbage makes my stomach swell and I get gas from it (I don't think it's worth eating the food if my body has a reaction to it). I already mentioned safflower oil. Let me mention sesame seeds, this one is kind of funny, but not really. My good friend who happens to be a Vegan suggested using sesame seeds to replace the calcium lost in your diet from not drinking milk. So I tried it out and thought I was ok. At first things seemed great, I felt like I was on top of the world (if not for the light sensitivity). Every nerve in my body seemed alive, everything tasted great (ice cream was a blast, I know, I was replacing milk right). I was incredibly attuned to other people, I felt so happy and calm. In fact all of my inhibitions (almost) were lifted. Then I started having headaches and extreme light sensitivity. So I stopped eatting the sesame seeds (actually making them into a "milk"). My mom told me that what I described sounded like what people on LSD describe, not really funny. (I don't eat sesame seeds anymore). I have also found that a lot of food should be eaten raw, but I don't like the all raw food diet. Some foods that are definantly better raw are, most veggies and fruits, milk and cheeses, fish (I like tilapia prepared raw), nuts and seeds (soaked), grains (though I just don't like most of them raw, except buckwheat). I have a really great chart that describes the different Neuro Transmitters in our brains. I wish I could just scan it to the web, but since I don't know how to do that just yet I will attempt to write it out. Serotonin: Effects- emotional stability Deficiencies Result In- Lack of rational emotion; feelings of irritability; sudden unexplained tears; sleep problems. Supplements Required- Calcium, Magnesium, Chromium, Vitamin A Foods in Which Found- Turkey, Ham, Milk, Cheese GABA: Effects- Staying Calm Deficiencies Result In- Free floating anxiety; fearful, insecure feelings; feelings that things are closing in around you; unexplained panic. Suppliments Required- L-Glutamine, Vitamin B6 Foods In Which Found- Fish (especially mackerel), wheat bran Enkephalins: Effects- Psychological pain relief Deficiencies Result In- Feelings of incompleteness; lack of fulfillment; feelings of inferiority or inadequacy; never feels "equal." Supplements Required- D-Phenylalanine, Vitamin B6, Folic Acid Foods in Which Found- Fish & Algae, Wheat Germ, Green Leafy Vegetables, Egg Yolk Dopamine: Effects- Pleasure, Reward, Good Feelings Towards Others, Maternal and Paternal Love. Deficiencies Result In- Anhedonia: no pleasure in life; world looks colorless; inability to "love"; no remorse about personal behavior. Supplements Required- L-Phenylatanine, Vitamin B6 Foods in Which Found- Fish and Algae, Blackstrap Molasses Norepinephrine: Effects- Arousal, Energy, Drive Deficiencies Result In- Lack of ambition, lack of drive, lack of energy, depression. Supplements Required- L-Phenylalanine, Vitamin B6 Foods in Which Found- Fish and Algae, Beef Liver or Kidney I also have a chart of the Affect of Drugs and Alcohol on the body, the first few seem repetitive but the next few are different. Norepinephrine: Function- Arousal, energy, drive Drugs that Affect it- Cocaine, speed, caffeine, tobacco Deficiencies Result In- Lack of drive, depression, lack of energy Amino Acid Supplement- L-phenylalanine GABA: Function- Staying calm, relaxation, focus Drugs that Affect it- Valium, alcohol, marijuana, tobacco Deficiencies Result In- Free-floating anxiety, fearfulness, insecurity, can't relax or sleep, unexplained panic. Amino Acid Supplement- L-glutamine Endorphins: Function- Psychological/physical pain relief, pleasure, reward, good/loving feelings toward others. Drugs that Affect them- Heroin, marijuana, alcohol, sugar, tobacco Deficiencies Result In- Overly Sensitive, feelings of incompleteness, anhedonia (inability to experience pleasure normally), world lacks color, inability to love. Amino Acid Supplement- dL-phenylalanine Serotonin: Function- Emotional stability, pain tolerance, self-confidence Drugs that Affect it- Sugar, marijuana, ecstasy, tobacco Deficiencies Result In- Depression, obsession, worry, low self-esteem, sleep problems, hunger, irritability. Amino Acid Supplement- Chromium, Picolinate -increases L-Tryptophan availability. On a last note, I really like Dagoba Dark Chocolate (you can find it online if not in your health food store). I also like Tulsi (holy basil) tea and Roobios tea. All of these have helped me deal with stress and anxiety and they taste great to boot!

Tulsi Tea

Man I have just found the best stuff!!

Dr. Mercola recommended it on his website, Tulsi Tea. I knew though that I could find it at the Sunflower Farmers market near my house so I went up and bought some. I am loving the raspberry peach version, yummy!! I also love Roobios tea or it's also called African Red Tea. I love both of these because they are caffine free totally better for you then Green, white or black tea (teas from the Camilla Sinisitus (SIC) leaf).

I finally got a run in today. My right calf has been grumpy with me and hurting so I have been stuck with walking. Today I took a really long walk up the really big incline path by my house then when I got to the top I turned around and did 2 minute sprints down the other way. It was great and I feel really good.

I've been thinking about the things that I thought that were cool when I was a kid. Like babysitting, having my own phone line in my room (I strung one from my moms room to mine), having a backyard swimming pool (me and my brother started to dig one once, my dad didn't appreciate it), driving (way not cool anymore), candy and ice cream (you know how I feel about these, except I do appreciate coconut icecream with raw chocolate and agave and Xocai chocolate).

I was big into study when I was a kid. In fact I hated school with a passion. I would walk home after being dropped off, not to watch TV, but to get all of my dad's books out (for some reason I wanted to read all of them). I would set up my study schedule, make my lunch and be in perfect bliss reading through all of those old books. I didn't understand half of what I was reading, but I wanted to. I remember listening to a tape that he had about morris code, I can't remember a thing about it now but it was interesting at the time.

What is also interesting is to compare what I was facinated by when I was little to what I feel about things now. Take rainbows for instance they always evoked a sense of wonder in me. I loved to make them by spraying water from the hose up into the sunlight. I also remember one day when there was to be a meteor shower. I went with my cousin to the store and bought these rainbow glasses. We sat back in our lawn chairs, actually in the middle of the street, and watched the meteors as they seemingly came straight towards us. It was fantastic watching the light burst into rainbows. I was also very earthy, I loved to walk out and smell the fall leaves decaying and drying. I loved to jump into them and crunch them up. I loved to sit in the bushes and smell the fresh earth around me. I would watch the bugs and imagine how things were long ago when there were no humans destroying what was natural around them. I was a very animistic kid and sympathized with the trees that had deep cuts on them and were weeping sap out. The Chinease elm tree does that, it weeps out a brown sap sometimes when it has lost a limb. I also felt differently towards cats and dogs and animals in general. Cats were and are fun creatures to think about. They are so hauty, but some are really friendly. Our new little kitten is a friendly creature and dosen't like to be alone. In fact I was happy to hear her marrow for us when we went upstairs.

I have decided that I definantly get PMS because I feel so differently during the course of the month. I only feel like writing at certain times in the month, like right now. For most of the month though I am intensly interested in learning. If I had a day to myself I would sit down and read as much as I could, I would not be done in a day I would want weeks, years. I am never satisfied with not learning. People who don't like to learn bug the heck out of me. In fact although I love my husband he dosen't like to learn the same way that I do and it really bugs me. He does talk to people though, usually the guys at work, so I can talk to him about things a bit. But he doesn't get the deeper meaning of things or the nuances and dual meanings of things, thus very shallow conversation ensues. That's just how things are though, and I love him so I deal with it.

Advice for anyone looking for someone to marry... take a long time, be engaged a long time and talk a lot. If you are an intellectual, don't marry a jock (unless he likes to read and think also).

Well gotta finish this tome!! Because I have other things to do (like visiting Busuu.com and learning French).

~Strawberry Girl

Cycles

I am finally feeling extraordinarily well again today. I am really starting to wonder if there is something to the Chinease belief in meridians and Chi and blockages because it seems like there is something blocking up my head a lot of times but it is not like a cold (you know mucus and stuff). I want to know what's going on so I think I will research Chi a bit and see what I can get from it.

~Strawberry Girl

SAD

I think the scariest day of your life is when you wake up and see things differently then you previously have.

That happened to me last year when I became disillusioned about the SAD diet or Standard American Diet.

What is funny is that I read Kevin Trudeau's Book called "Natural Cures "They" don't want you to know about."

Ok - That book is hard to read because he rants a lot and he repeats himself a lot. But he outlines some things that make sense also, however I think he is absolutly over the top about some things. For instance he suggests that you wear white indoors (not particulary bad, but could be weird if you made a religion out of it), and that you stand on a giant magnent in your back yard. Plus he is really into internal cleansing, although I do think that it is good to do cleanses, but I don't agree with harsh methods.

Here is my cleanse: Start the morning off by eating a young coconut (or Thai coconut) they are white cylinder shapped coconuts wrapped up in plastic, usually kept in the produce section. You cut off the outer husk, then pierce the bottom "mouth" and let the juice (about 2 cups) drain into a cup. Afterwards you can take a hammer or heavy knife and hit it in the middle (not on the end where the "eyes" are or the other side, but the middle like where you would open a grapefruit in half). When it opens up spoon out the meat and eat it.

Then eat as much celery as you can stand throughout the day. Then eat an avocado and a green apple (Granny Smith). Then about an hour later eat another avocado and another apple. You can also eat carrots and other fresh veggies.

Preety soon you will see how "clean" you can get, without harsh herbs or chemicals.

Aside from cleanses, it is good to take a close look at your diet in order to avoid the junk that manufacturers put into their (your) food.

If you eat anything out of a box, wrapper or can you should really scrutinize it. There are a lot of fillers and tricks in these products. Look for HFCS (High Fructose Corn Syrup) I think I already posted a link to an article about it, don't believe that it is safe to eat. Also look for Modified anything (not gonna be good for you), hydraganated oils (trans fats), MSG, sugar, Artificial colors (they will affect you for the worse, believe me), plus anything that say's "Natural" (Natural on a lable may mean that it origionally came from a natural source, but doesn't neccessarily mean that it is natural now, it can also mean how it "naturally" is suppossed to taste and could be derived from a petrochemical). Also look for the word "Spices" which could mean anything from chemical flavorings to MSG. Look for Propolyne Glycol and other types of this word. This is a substance that is used in your deoderant, shampoo, my dad uses it to lubricate heater parts (In fact he has a large bucket of it), you can also find it in your antifreeze and believe it or not in your sour cream, YUMMY!!

Check out the Weston A Price foundation online http://www.westonaprice.org/

Weston Price was a dentist that had a phenomenon start appearing in his office. A lot of cavities and jaw deformation. He decided to locate people still eating their indigiouness diets and make a comparason between them and those that ate refined sugars, flours and canned goods. Keep in mind that this was at the beginning of the industrial "revolution," and that there were still some people that ate their indigeouness diets.

I bought his book called "Nutrition and Physical Degeneration" and it was an eye opener. The differences between those who ate a traditional diet and their children or siblings who did not was striking. The facial structure of those who started to eat refined foods became narrower and the teeth started to crowd and become full of cavities. He visited people from all over the world and the same thing was happening everywhere. In one instance that I remember, he visited the Ekimos in Alaska. They were coming down with all sorts of ailments, bad teeth, liver failure, overweight, heart disease. When they went back to eatting their traditional diets all of these diseases started to clear up and go away. I recommend this book to anyone who is seeking the truth about food. I also recomend that you should eat as much whole, real and raw food as possible. I don't recommend a Vegan diet however, because as much as I would like to never have to eat animal flesh or products I just cannot sustain that type of a diet, I personally have tried it and felt sick, sick, sick. Vegan diets have to be carefully, very carefully planned. Substitute meats are not healthy for you. I found this out the hard way. Plus after reading Dr. Prices book he mentions that he wasn't able to find any indigiouness group that did not eat meat.
I came to the idea of careful consumption of meat and eggs (I just cant do milk). I try to only eat eggs that are from a farm (I have found a couple of sources). I also try to eat only free range chicken and pastured grass fed beef. This I do very sparingly and try to be frugal in how I use these animals. I think that you should respect the food that you get and not waste it.

Well that is it for now.

~Strawberry Girl


P.S. Here is an article that I found just today that points this out (partially)

http://news.yahoo.com/s/usnews/20081020/ts_usnews/10thingsthefoodindustrydoesntwantyoutoknow

Finding out What is "worth it"

I'm feeling better today, I was blowing off steam yesterday, because I was frustrated by what is happening in this country.

It is raining outside today, I am glad. For some reason the rain always seems soothing to me. I have been listening to General Confrence today, it is a LDS meeting that they broadcast twice a year, I always feel so refreshed and renewed in spirit after listening.

You know I have found that this life takes courage. Courage to be different, to stand up for what you believe in and to seek out the truth. It is very difficult to be trying to hold the line on healthy living and eating when most of my family looks askance at me. Let me tell you, to be trying to do something because you believe in the principle even though you may not know all of the details or all of the truth is hard.

Here is an example. I began my journey by throwing out my microwave, I heard that deoderant contained aluminum and that it had been linked to tumor growth, and I also heard that cell phones could cause cancer. So one morning I was downstairs trying to cook breakfast (oatmeal)on the stove when somebody called. I had to run upstairs to take a message (while holding the phone at arms length) and left the stove. After I took the message I could smell the oatmeal burning so I ran downstairs and turned off the stove. Then felt utterly pittiful because I had no oatmeal to eat, the house was filled with smoke which made my hair stink and I stunk because I hadn't yet found a deoderant without aluminum that worked (I've found one now called Herbal magic Jasmine scent, which I like). So the thought came to me, "is this worth it, do I really believe that this is an improvement in my life?" That was kind of an ironic moment. So I went upstairs and took a shower with my organic shampoo (which kind of smells like roses, an old favorite scent). Then I went downstairs and cooked some more oatmeal and put nuts and dried cranberries in it, and I felt so good and my mind was so clear, that I felt that my efforts were worth it. (BTW I tried to put on my old deoderant several months later and it hurt my pits).

Thankfully I no longer have to stink, I am better at keeping track of things on the stove (you don't know how many eggs that I caused to explode because I forgot about them), and I know what to eat to make me feel good.

So it is worth it, no matter what it takes, no matter how long or how stupid you feel during the effort of trying to find out the truth. In the end if you find out the things that are worth it, you will be happy.

~Strawberry Girl

Great Gobs of Corn Syrup

Well, well, well

I saw an interesting ad the other day. A lady and her fellow are relaxing on the grass having a picnic. She offers him 1 red popsicle and he say's "I thought you loved me?" and she say's "What?" He say's doesn't that popsicle contain High Fructose Corn Syrup and she say's "So?" and he say's "isn't that stuff bad for you?" and he seems a bit puzzled as to why. She tells him that "A little bit is safe for you, it's just a popsicle" or something to that effect.

This certainly points out the general confusion and misinformation on HFCS, but it does so in a way that play's on our fear of being "Paranoid" or different. HFCS, it's safe, right? NOT AT ALL, Don't be fooled. Here is an excerpt from an article by Dr. Mercola. I have actually read on this further and they are working hard over in Australlia to ban this stuff. Here is the excerpt

"Part of what makes HFCS such an unhealthy product is that it is metabolized to fat in your body far more rapidly than any other sugar, and, because most fructose is consumed in liquid form, its negative metabolic effects are significantly magnified.
Whereas the glucose in other sugars is used by your body, and is converted to blood glucose, fructose is a relatively unregulated source of fuel that your liver converts to fat and cholesterol."

Here is a link to this article:

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2008/09/23/dramatic-example-of-how-the-food-industry-lies-to-you-about-corn.aspx?source=nl

Don't be fooled.

~Strawberry Girl

Live like no one's watching!

How many people out there really enjoy their lives? How many people on Wall Street get up each day with a feeling of well being, that their lives matter, that this world is good?

When you focus on those things that are important like, good health, good friends, good music and family. Then no matter how much money you have you will have a good life.

Good health, I want to postulate that it is very essential. Yes if you have other things then you can try to enjoy them, but view my world for a minute when I eat the wrong foods. . . I am dizzy, half awake, my logic is disrupted because my mind is cloudy, I am grumpy, and I feel a general sense of malease. (Imagine the song Away From the Sun by Three Doors Down)

Contrast that to how I felt Monday, refreshed, calm, clear headed, with a feeling of well being. I had been eating a very good diet for the past week. There is a big difference in the world between the two. Right now I am slightly dizzy and sleepy because I had maple syrup on my Gluten Free waffle, I am going to have to walk it off or sleep it off. I have got to find a way to replace sugary syrup.

Good friends, family and music can also come and go but I find that without them my world is not as exeptional.

I also like a good herbal tea, Roobios (Roy Boss) tea or i.e. red tea from Africa is absolutely my favorite right now. I have enjoyed mint teas in the past, but found out that I am sensitive to them so I am trying to avoid them for now.

Also, how can you enjoy life if you have no one to talk to? Friends and family are the spice and color to life. Sure I am an artist in my own mind, I enjoy solitude as much as the next person, but I also enjoy cooking with my friends and good conversation. My good friend Tanya moved away and I miss her deeply because we were able to cook and talk together.

Enjoy Life, even if you have poor health, no friends or family. Even if your world is bereft of music, there is a way to have meaning to your life. Viktor Frankle a survivor of a Nazi Concentration camp, endured the worst conditions to life in human history. Yet he said that even under these conditions there were people who went around lifting others, giving up there last piece of bread and showing that they could choose to find dignity, even in suffering. Then there were others who's spirits were broken, I don't know that my own spirit would stand up to that test. But it gives me hope that there were people who did rise above their conditions, how inspiring. If they died, and most did, even then there lives had meaning. They, through the eyes of others, have given us all a glimpse of the better way of being. I am so grateful to have learned about them. The Nazi Concentration camps seemed to me only places where broken people were made, but even Viktor Frankle shows me that you can survive and change and have a better attitude then you had before.

One of my favorite things about this book is what he wrote about love. His young wife was killed, though he didn't know it. During some of the hardest parts of his internment he imagined her, and talked to her and felt her presence there. He had a beautiful love for her. Not the crass baseness of the physical, (for that drive disappeared under the unique stress they were under)but he loved her essence.

Oh to be so loved!!

In any case, I am through for now with sitting in front of my computer. There is very little of beautiful enjoyment here, although I did find a beautiful You Tube video of Peruvian Pipe music. I am going out to enjoy the day.

~Strawberry Girl